Flirting on the 1

by Julie Manis

     One bitter cold day last February, I was shivering in a subway station when I felt someone’s heated glance. It was a cute young dyke, about twenty, all leather jacket, Doc Maartens, spiky hair and flawless skin. She was gorgeous.

     I’m straight, but I always enjoy a good compliment. And if I’m going to be cruised by a woman, I like her to be hot. At 44, having someone in their twenties stare lustfully gives me hope that I don’t yet look like I could be their mom.

     So it was with a bit of a swagger that I entered the subway car. And who should choose to sit across from me but my young admirer. Still staring. Whew!  Well, I knew why she couldn’t take her eyes off of me. I was sexy. I was radiating. I was A-plus fine.

     It was only natural that I should be glowing.  I had just come from a delicious romp at my boyfriend’s place. Early  in our relationship, he and I perfected the formula for our ideal date: 10 percent dinner, 15 percent conversation and 75 percent sex. That afternoon we had decided to skip lunch.  Food, that is. So I was probably giving off some heavy duty pheromones. Or maybe it was my mussed hair and smeary make-up --  you know, the look that works so well on supermodels.

     I could feel young Sappho’s eyes on me while I read my newspaper. Whenever I glanced up, she was still staring— and right at my crotch. I crossed and recrossed my legs, licked my lips and felt like a
fabulous tease. When she got off halfway through my trip, I was a little disappointed.

     But not for long. A man of about 50 boarded the train and sat down right where she had been sitting. He looked like an all American blue collar type, probably played football in high school. He had his jacket off, as if the cold weather was no match for his hot nature. The guy was big, a little mushy around the midsection, but with thick, heavily muscled arms.  He looked like he made his living doing something which involved heavy lifting, maybe some kind of construction work. I’d walked past guys like this on the street thousands of times. I knew that staring at women came second nature to him. And, man, was he ever checking me out!

     Wow, I thought, I’m irresistible. He’d probably like to play it cool, but he’s just too turned on by my sexual aura. I kind of checked him out, too. Not that I was interested in him. But I wanted to see the bulge I was causing, and feel the tremendous rush of sexual power that I could wield so effortlessly. Some days I really had it going on!  I even thought about calling my boyfriend when I got home,
just to let him know about this carnal chain reaction that our lovemaking had started.

     Mr. Construction Worker got off at Times Square. He can’t stand it, I thought. He’s off in search of the last remaining sexual outlet that hasn’t been Disney-ed out of the neighborhood. Maybe he’s on his
way to a peepshow. He needs a quick hit of flesh before he goes home to the wife in Queens. I felt baaad, and it felt good.

     So I wasn’t the least bit surprised when his seat was immediately taken by a young business type. And I wasn’t surprised that this new guy was also taken with me. Suit, tie, briefcase, thirties, probably on his way home to his young bride and baby on the Upper West Side.  Yet here he was, sneaking shy glances at me, his eyes traveling way beyond my face. I’m to sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my pants, too sexy for this subway... I riffed in my head.

     I almost hated to get off when I reached my stop. I wanted to keep on going with this game at which I was so obviously gifted.  It felt like teasus interruptus to leave now. But I had things to do, places to be and at some point, one has to set aside being a sex symbol and get on with life. I wrapped my scarf and zipped up my jacket. I knew it would be cold outside.

     What I wasn’t prepared for was just how cold it was. I could feel the wind biting against...my crotch. That’s when I discovered my fly had been wide open the whole time.

Julie Manis has been a Manhattan resident since 1982.  She takes the subway often enough to buy the unlimited card.